ah, just the nonsense i spout on a constant basis.  like FROLICKING WITH RAINBOW WEREWOLVES IN A HAUNTED GRAVEYARD PUTTING SPELLS ON STARS AND SMOKING PURPLE CRYSTALS AND BEWITCHING CRYSTALLINE GHOSTS WITH BONES AND LAVENDER TANGLED IN MY GLITTER-COVERED HAIR WHILE ROLLING IN DIAMOND DEMON CUM COVERING YOU WITH BLACK LIPSTICK KISSES AND POURING BLUE MOON INTO YOUR THIRD EYE AND CHAIN-SMOKING DJARUM BLACKS THROUGH MY TOES.  it’s just an over-indulgent, embellished way of speaking that i frequently resort to that usually involves calling everything a goddess or a princess.  it’s almost always horseshit and in capital letters.  it’s also how i flirt with people and communicate my fEeLiNgz.

it’s not called “cosmic bullshit” because i think cosmic things are bullshit.  i strive for everything i do to be cosmic, whether i’m gardening or chopping vegetables or driving or pooping.  i use words like “divine”, “kosmick”, “empyrean”, “infinite”, “magick”, “spirits”, “heavenly”, “goddess”, “big glitter in the sky”, and “cosmic bullshit” when something’s unexplainably complex, gorgeous, mind-blowing, spiritual, or beyond the realm of human thought or language.  other than creating my own language out of tree-talk and spirit-dialects, there’s not much else I can do.  words are futile devices…  I understand that words are important so we can communicate with each other and describe our human experience, but words can’t portray reality perfectly.  So you can call me laue, you can call me princess,  you can call me girl, you can call me white, you can call me human being, you can call me cosmic being, you can call me energy, you can call me bones and hair, you can call me dirt and tomb, you can call me buddha, but none of them will be correct.  I am all and none.

perhaps i started initially calling my way of talking “cosmic bullshit” because if you take it literally, it is all bullshit.  i’m not *actually* JUMPING ON LAVENDER MUSHROOM CLOUDS EATING RAINBOWS AND SNOWFLAKES WHILE GOLDEN DEER SPIRITS FLOAT IN AND OUT OF MY EARS AND MOUTH.  i’m not *actually* MERMAID GODDESS DIVINE FROM THE MAGICAL MOONLIT UNICORN CASTLE OF THE TURQUOISE SEA AND THE BLACK MOUNTAINS.  i’m not *actually* DRINKING GAIA-BLESSED TEA MADE BY MINIATURE CAT ELVES IN THE LAND OF THE COBRA KINGS BROUGHT TO ME BY PIXIES WHO COMMUNICATE THROUGH BEE-TALK.  my third eye isn’t *actually* DRILLING A DIAMOND-STUDDED HOLE INTO MY FACE LETTING THE SPARKLY COSMIC GODS OF JUPITER AND SATURN FLOOD INTO MY BRAIN SPACE TO THROW COSTUME PARTIES WITH ZOMBIE FISH AND ROBOT DINOSAURS WITH MONOCLES.  but i can dream…

enchanting mundane reality makes me sane.  we’re all filled with cosmic bullshit and we all want to spout the stardust in us.  that’s why we made tumblrz. even if that magick isn’t *actually* there, we created it so it’s a part of us.

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Q: “it seems like you use the word ‘cosmic’ in a way that’s different than standard definitions or interpretations of the word.  could you explain what you mean by it?”

A: that is really such a complicated answer.  hm… i know i use it differently than most people do… it’s a word i use to articulate things i can’t because of the hindrance of language and my own human mentality.  i guess, to try and explain, everything i consider metaphysical, spiritual, good, otherworldly, beyond human expression, magical, divine, holy, and infinitely complex & gorgeous… things that enchant reality, the lessons you learn on psychedelics, the overindulgent poetic-glamorization of our selves and lives, communication with aliens and gods, fantasy, space, the things you thought the first time you smoked weed, adventure time, our interaction with the divine and things we can’t understand, and the sparkling bits of beauty in this dark, sad world.  um, does that make any sense?  haha, i’m still working it out myself. :)

(it was so hard to describe what cosmic meant to me without using the word cosmic.  seriously, cosmic to me is like other people using “um” and “like” and “er” when they don’t know what to say, haha)

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i’m gonna go ahead and do like the buddhists do and explain what something is by telling you what it isn’t.  whenever i have to do something mundane and horrible (physics homework or cleaning up barf), or whenever i’ve behaved badly (watched t.v. all day instead of playing outside in the sparkling sunshine), that’s NOT cosmic.